Losing a pet is so much more painful than most people realize. It can even end in “broken heart syndrome.” Here’s how.
The Agony of Losing a Pet
When a pet dies, the family who loved that fur baby is grief-stricken. Pets are family members. They are there when we wake up, and beside us when we go to sleep. They see us sick, happy, angry, sad, and they never pass judgment. Our pets see the truth of who we are and they love us in spite of ourselves.
Isn’t that what family is supposed to do? Be there in good and bad times, offering support and unconditional love? Some may say they don’t even get that kind of care from their human families.
That’s why Scientific American says we should take pet loss seriously.
The aching hearts of those who lose a pet are often lonely hearts. After her dog died, a woman suffered from a terrible condition called “broken heart syndrome.” SA explains, “It can happen when the response to grief is so severe the person exhibits symptoms that mimic a heart attack, including elevated hormone levels that can be 30 times greater than normal.”
Essentially, the author says when you’re in anguish after this kind of loss, you need to reach out and let people know how badly you’re hurting.
“We need to seek social support from people we know will understand and sympathize with our emotions and not judge us for them.”
I think as a society we can always do a better job of supporting each other.
Crossing the Rainbow Bridge
You were used to morning purring to wake you up and now it’s quiet. You and your good boy always went for a walk before heading to bed. Now the leash hangs still.
When you open the front door, no one runs to you. At night all you can think about is how long it been since you slept in a bed without a four-legged friend taking up all the space.
That’s why the rest of us should show up, be loving, supportive and continue to be so for as long as it takes. There is no timeline on grief.
“It is time we gave grieving pet owners the recognition, support and consideration they need. Yes, it is up to us to identify and address our emotional wounds when our pet dies, but the more validation we receive from those around us, the quicker and the more complete our psychological recovery will be.” – Scientific American
If you’ve lost a pet, I want you to know how sorry I am you’re in pain. Tell us about them in the comments. What made you love them so? Did they have a favorite toy or a sweet way of showing you their love?
Don’t hesitate to reach out to a therapist to help you get through.
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249 comments on “The Agony of Losing a Pet Is Worse Than People Know”
I lost my sweet 14 year old black and white shih tzu on Friday, April 29th. She insisted on sleeping with me the first night we had together. Her name was Buffy, and I got her when she was 3 months and 5 days old. We got so close so fast and I have so many memories coming to the surface. She got unreversably sick at the beginning of last week. She wasn’t eating or drinking and she couldn’t relieve herself. I took her twice to the vet’s for fluids before they told me it was her kidneys and she was not going to get any better. I wanted to do right by her and let her go. I know it was the right thing to do but it hurts so bad. I’m broken. Just two weeks before, she was making me laugh. I don’t get it. I want her back in my arms so much.
My boy Bear was put to sleep on 23rd Dec 2021. He was 15yrs and 9 months old. He was the most gentle loving dog.
I lost my 14.6 year old dachshund Abbie in January. She had fluid on her lungs. She died in my living room while I was getting ready to take her to the vet. She was my heart dog. I miss her so much. I am 3 months in and I don’t know what is acceptable to feel. Am I still in the “early days” of grief? I’m in a lot of pain and sometimes I don’t know how I will live without her. Thank you.
I’m suzi, I lost my Izzy girl last week. She was my soul dog. I rescued her from a bad situation. She was a lab/pit mix that I was so hesitant to rescue. I did and she was MY GIRL! so loving, loved my grandson, she played, and laughed. We were one. She knew what I said and I knew what she said/wanted. She wouldn’t go to be until I did. My heart is broken in a million little pieces. Shes not here. I have pictures everywhere, but my heart hurts soooooo bad.
Lost all my pets in a housefire 2 days ago. 6 Momma cats, 13 kittens, our housecats, our border collie, cockatoo and box turtle. I don’t think I’ll ever get past this pain
We had to put down my best friend Ford last night. We got him from a rescue almost 13 years ago. I haven’t felt this numb since I lost my mom. I’m just a year sober, and the next few days are going to test me so much. I have his favorite blanket on me right now which is covered in his white fur and his smell. Losing a pet is a tragedy – but I keep reminding myself that as horrid as this feels, it’s worth suffering for the 13 years I had my best friend. RIP sweet Ford
Don, hang on!! You are right where FORD would want you to be! You took care of yourself when you had him, right? Yes. So please continue. Love and light. God bless you. Suzi
I lost my sweet girl Leighla this past Monday; she was 10 years old and it happened in the blink of an eye. She was only sick for a month (that we know of), and we believe it was a combination of heart failure and a tumor which ultimately took her. She was the sweetest most wonderful girl. She was a Basset Hound, but thought herself a Herding Dog as she would herd the whole house when on a walk! She loved treats, and car rides! My favorite thing she would do with me, and me alone was nuzzle. She would push her forehead into mine, and we would just rub faces and nuzzle for a few minutes. She always end it with a swift kiss. She really was my heart, and I truly do feel the void that has been left! It physically hurts when I think about her.
Amanda, I am crying reading your story, thank you, Leigha is still with you, in spirit form. Talk to her, she will hear you
my baby girl was only 9. sweetest spoiled beagle . We gave her a bone as a treat but ended up killing here. How will i sleep tonight as she always waited for me to go to bed so she could have her bully stick. She stole our socks and guarded them along with loving her walks.
I’m sorry for your loss. I lost my own only a few days ago. My heart, thoughts, and prayers are with you.
My little girl dog died and she was my best friend when my mom got sick she stayed with me and I got sad and she stayed with me and then I was in a relationship that wasn’t healthy and was left alone a lot of the times and it was just me and my little girl and I talked to her about everything and we did everything together and we ate our ice cream together and I sang to her at night when the unhealthy relationship ended I was very depressed and she stayed with me and she wouldn’t leave me and sometimes she was the only reason I would get out of bed . She used to steal stuff out of my purse or in a basket on the floor or anywhere really to trade it back for belly rubs and ear rubs and when you walked in the door she always had something she had stolen in her mouth she was always right there to greet me when I came in the door she slept with me at night it hurts so bad I don’t know what to do. My heart actually hurts and I don’t know what happened to her she was having trouble breathing but she was on medication and I came home from work the other day and she could hardly breathe it all and I called vets that were open and no one help me and she died about an hour later while I was talking to her and I knew she was going to die and it’s just seems unbearable and I can’t stop crying and I can’t stop missing her so much thank you for letting me post here
My precious Kiwi-bird died just 2 days ago. Now my heart is broken. She was my source of happiness and strength. I ate with her (she would sometimes attempt to steal my food), played with her, did my homework with her, and cuddled with her. It was her birthday, February 16th. She died on February 8th. 10 cherished months with her… I remeber thinking of attending college with her, planning out a whole future with her; that’s all gone now. The average life span for her bird species is 20-30 years. I don’t know if can ever come over her death. Perhaps I won’t; she’s crossing the Rainbow Bridge now, though. May peace be bestowed upon her in heaven. I love you Kiwi.