Losing a pet is so much more painful than most people realize. It can even end in “broken heart syndrome.” Here’s how.
The Agony of Losing a Pet
When a pet dies, the family who loved that fur baby is grief-stricken. Pets are family members. They are there when we wake up, and beside us when we go to sleep. They see us sick, happy, angry, sad, and they never pass judgment. Our pets see the truth of who we are and they love us in spite of ourselves.
Isn’t that what family is supposed to do? Be there in good and bad times, offering support and unconditional love? Some may say they don’t even get that kind of care from their human families.
That’s why Scientific American says we should take pet loss seriously.
The aching hearts of those who lose a pet are often lonely hearts. After her dog died, a woman suffered from a terrible condition called “broken heart syndrome.” SA explains, “It can happen when the response to grief is so severe the person exhibits symptoms that mimic a heart attack, including elevated hormone levels that can be 30 times greater than normal.”
Essentially, the author says when you’re in anguish after this kind of loss, you need to reach out and let people know how badly you’re hurting.
“We need to seek social support from people we know will understand and sympathize with our emotions and not judge us for them.”
I think as a society we can always do a better job of supporting each other.
Crossing the Rainbow Bridge
You were used to morning purring to wake you up and now it’s quiet. You and your good boy always went for a walk before heading to bed. Now the leash hangs still.
When you open the front door, no one runs to you. At night all you can think about is how long it been since you slept in a bed without a four-legged friend taking up all the space.
That’s why the rest of us should show up, be loving, supportive and continue to be so for as long as it takes. There is no timeline on grief.
“It is time we gave grieving pet owners the recognition, support and consideration they need. Yes, it is up to us to identify and address our emotional wounds when our pet dies, but the more validation we receive from those around us, the quicker and the more complete our psychological recovery will be.” – Scientific American
If you’ve lost a pet, I want you to know how sorry I am you’re in pain. Tell us about them in the comments. What made you love them so? Did they have a favorite toy or a sweet way of showing you their love?
Don’t hesitate to reach out to a therapist to help you get through.
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249 comments on “The Agony of Losing a Pet Is Worse Than People Know”
I just lost my little chiweenie bugs 2 weeks ago. Sudden heart attack. I did CPR but could not save him. The look on his face, him gasping 3 times before dying, he looked so scared. I’m honestly traumatized by the whole sudden event. He wasn’t even terribly old for his breed, 11 & in good health.. I should have had 4 to 5 more years with him at least. The pain is unbelievable. He was my emotional support, little soft head, snorts & spaz paws when we danced in the kitchen together, loved to cuddle & loved me fiercely. My heart is broken.
we had to put my 15 year old cat down, he was very sick with an ulcerous tumor and in a lot of pain but it still was very hard. the next day my brother died suddenly. i don’t think i truly was able to grieve my cat because it all went to my brother. it was harder dealing with the loss later when things quieted down. i see something every day that reminds me of him. he had his favorite catnip banana that he always would lay with. now my other cat lays with it all the time. i think he misses his brother too, but he has been a big help to have still with me as well.
We had rescued a male and a female, Joey and Simone. They were buddies for over 9 years. We found out Simone had terminal tumors and not much longer to live. We had the time to love up on her and were prepared for her send off. We were not prepared for our healthy Joey to die 19 days later of a broken heart. That devasted us so tremendously, that over 6 years have passed and I still choke up. We only recently rescued another dog, Gunner, that has been an absolute blessing and has helped us fill the void of the last 6 years. Thank you for this article.
Thank you for shedding light on this issue. I had my beautiful Min-Jee for 11 wonderful year’s. I lost her in December 2022. Acute heart arrhythmia. I was grief stricken, heart broken with such sadness. I missed her so much, I would cry my eyes out, just speaking about her. Well, three 3 months have passed and I have a new puppy. Some say it was too soon, who knows, but I felt so much love toward my new pup, she makes me smile and I never ever will forget my Min-Jee. I just want to give my love and kindness again and my new pup, Eun-Ji is a fluffy of joy.
I tell people it’s never too soon. You’re not replacing the dog you loved and lost. You just have room to love another. Only you can tell what timing is right for you. I have had several dogs in my life. They have all been loved and continue to be well after they’re gone. I just know I have enough love for others. I also believe it helps heal.
On Feb 7, 2023 we lost 3 very beloved dogs. Cicero German Shepherd age 11. Spent 10 years as a Service Dog for children with autism.
Rosie Bot, German Shepherd age 3, Bot was intensely in love with me and was very protective and extremely affectionate towards me. She went everywhere I could possibly take her, even to work. She was loyal, she was beautiful and she was smart!! She would open doors like a pro, lock us out if she was left inside while we stepped outside she could work a bolt lock better then most humans!! She was just still starting her life.
Rugar aka “Love Bug” German Shepherd/Pit Bull mix age 1 1/2.
He was born in our home, he was the only one that we couldn’t let go of he was just a chill and attentive puppy. He came into our lives when our roommate needed him most, as life had kinda kicked him down Bugs showed him hope, adventure and love again. We called him our “Hybrid” bc of how muscular and handsome w his shiny black coat and one ear up while the other flopped just near the top. Just a love bug.
Sometime in the week prior someone entered our private property and put antifreeze soaked treats in the forest where the dogs would freely run and play as they had for over 10 years.
Bugs started getting sick the night before and we thought it was a mild symptom of some sort and we would check in the morning and see how he was doing. Next morning he seemed better so we went about our day took all 4 of our dogs out to run errands and when we got home the girls collapsed. We rushed them to the ER Vet where they did all they could but all 3 were far beyond anything but brutal pain until the end. We held them each as they passed away.
The 4th dog never liked to leave the house area so fortunately he wasn’t poisoned. He is sooooo depressed. He is chewing on himself. He is lost w out his pack.
My inside now feels dreadful. Life feels ugly.
Thousands in debt trying to save them.
There not waiting for me to knock groceries out if my arms bc they are so excited to love on me. I sleep w out them. I wake w / out them. The house is cleaner… and i hate it.
I don’t feel safe.
We got our Goldendoodle, Buddy, from a local shelter. His elderly owners were unable to keep him after going to a nursing home. He filled our lives with joy for 9 years. He was the most affectionate loving boy! He literally went from seemingly healthy to a diagnosis of IMHA caused by hemangiosarcoma overnight. I had to make the choice to sleep him two weeks later. This was in July of 2022 & I still cry every day. I miss our snuggles & him happily greeting me at the door every day. My heart is broken. It just wasn’t long enough.
I rescued a feral cat from a restaurant. She and other cats were born there. I made a trail of fish bites up the side walk and sat on the patio until I could reach down and grab her. She scratched my face all up. I was bleeding all over. The waitresses were wiping the blood off my face. They had tried to catche her, but no one could. Animal control was trying to catch the cats and I had to get her!
I didn’t realize she was pregnant when I took her in. She was a very wild and harmonal! She bit my arm and it became very infected. I would not give up on her. She gave birth to 3 little male kittens. I sat on the bathroom floor and helped her as she had her babies. She was such a good Mama! I was happy that she was safe and her kittens were safe. She didn’t have to try to find food. She was able to enjoy her last litter of kittens.
One of the kittens was promised to a friends little 4 year old daughter, Haleigh. She picked him out the night he was born from pictures I showed them and named him Buster. He was black and white. The first one born was a tabby cat. I adopted him out, but got him back 3 years later. The middle kitten was all black and the sweetest baby.
I was so happy living with my Kit Kat and Rocky! We had to have Rocky put down August 9, 2022. He was only 8 & 1/2 years old. He had kidney cancer. I believe it was injured from a rabies vaccine he had 2 years earlier. He was never the same. In October his Mama, Kit Kat, started having problems throwing up food. On December 29 we had to put her down because she had intestinal cancer. I had put so much into taming Kit Kat. I loved her so much. She was so beautiful. She was prissy!
On top of losing Kit Kat and Rocky, Haleigh’s cat Buster died 2 months after his Mom. He had brain cancer. Buster was Haleigh’s best friend. The little black kitten died at only 16 weeks old from kidney failure. Kit Kat was given vaccines when she pregnant and I wonder if the vaccines was the cause of all the cats shortened lives. Kit Kat and her 2 older kittens all died in less than 6 months. My heart is broken! I have not been able to give away or put away there toys or beds. I am still crying at memories. I miss them so much! I miss the meows, the funny things they did, sleeping on my bed and laying on the sofa with me at night. I miss petting them and kissing their faces. I am still in shock that I have lost them both. I feel like I have lost children. I have always had multiple cats and now I have none. I am 71 and we don’t plan to get anymore pets. I really don’t think my heart can take losing anymore. It is very hard to get over. I look forward to seeing them in Heaven someday.
I had a black Newfoundland lab for 16 years human years and I had to put him down in October 20th of 2022 because of mouth cancer he was my best friend he still is I still talk to him I miss his hugs honestly he’s been with me longer than any men he knew my moods and he helped me thru them.. Maxx2008-2022 I miss him so much..
Our Mini
I was the first one to hold you, hug you, kiss you the day we met you at the puppy shop. Nayeshu(My 5year old Daughter) fell in love with you at first sight when she saw your video even before she actually met you in person and you were Pompy’s (My Wife) dream come true as she held you in her arms. We welcomed you into our home as you became Nayeshu’s Little Sister. It was amazing how you bonded with each one of us in your own unique way which was so amazing that it was too good to be true. You knew Pompy was the one who cooks for u and believe me she was the greatest fan of eyes when you looked at her as u rolled those little innocent yet naughty little eyeballs at her, Nayeshu was Your partner in crime and you came to me for cuddles and biting with those needle sharp teeth. You refused to eat the same meal twice cus you were a princess and had your demands. Then the struggle began as u fell sick, repeated visits to the Doc, we tried our best, I made sure you had your medicines on time and Pompy force fed you so you will have the strength to fight. But by the time we knew what was wrong it was too late. Even Your Big Sis developed an allergy towards you but she did not care and still cuddled you and played with u and even kissed your face ignoring our scolding’s. With a heavy heart I took u to Tubu’s (He has 10 Rescue Pups) hoping that you will find the attention you deserved with him as you would not have been alone even for a sec(even if u wanted to) and we dreamed of watching you grow up. You seemed to have blended into their family, bonding with Aunty(Tubu’s Mom) from the minute you arrived which was inevitable as u were a strong and adorable little fluffball. But the ruthless virus was too devastating for you and I received the dreaded call late at night from Tubu that you passed in your sleep. We could not have you in life but we will not leave you in death as you sleep peacefully in our garden where i spent my childhood. May your Spirit roam free chasing squirrels and monkeys and whatever you set your sights upon in that garden as nothing can ever hurt my baby again.
The only thing we regret was when you stayed alone during the day till Pompy came back, please find a way to forgive us for that, our hearts will forever ache whenever we think of that, but be sure u will never ever leave our hearts till the day we meet again in the after life.
You stayed with us for 2 weeks but 4 souls connected and melted together in a bond that will last beyond eternity.
Miss You Mini Dusto(Naughty) Puawali(child).
P.S – Find Snowie and Frisky in puppy Heaven.
I lost Myrtle 2 years ago, and still feel pain in my stomach when I think of her. What made her so special is her vocabulary, and the way she’d try to talk. She was so expressive about everything.
I also think she’s been the hardest loss because she was so needy, in a cute and bossy way. She was so smart, and followed me everywhere!
I have rescued dogs my entire adult life, and all of them have filled my heart with such joy… and heart wrenching sorrow when they pass… and when they do, I always say “Having you in my life is worth any amount of pain I have to go through”… and somehow that makes it easier.
Never take your loved ones for granted… including your fur babies!