How to Be More Patient – You find yourself repeating the same thing over and over all day every day to your children. “Pick up your shoes, clean your room, don’t forget to put away your toys.” And yet, you find yourself still tripping over those same things no matter how many times you’ve told your children to put them away. A mom can only take so much before she explodes, right?
It’s not that we want to yell and get upset at our children, we love them with all our hearts. We remember what it feels like when our parents went off on us. We vowed never to do this to our children, and yet, we find ourselves slipping up more and more.
How to Be More Patient with Your Kids
If your New Year’s resolution is to be more patient with your kids, here are some tips to help you slowly work on this!
Be aware of why you are upset in the first place. Sometimes we are overwhelmed by our responsibilities or are upset at someone else, but snap at the first thing our child does. Once you are more aware of what is angering you, you can be patient with your kids.
Most of the time, the problem isn’t with your kids. Being thoughtful and realizing it is not your kids will help you not get upset at them even when you feel overwhelmed.
Don’t make your kids suffer from your attitude, especially if it isn’t their fault!
Change Your Perspective
We often treat our houseguest a lot better than we do our families. What if we treated our kids like their friends when they come over?
Would you still yell at them to hurry up, or get mad if they didn’t put away their clothes?
Try this new perspective out for a week if you can. You’ll see just how kind and happy everyone is in your home!
Take Time For Yourself
We all need time for self-care, especially moms. If you do not take that time for yourself, you will most likely easily get upset and lose your patience with your kids.
Schedule in that time for yourself each week so you can relax, decompress, and focus on yourself. You will feel so much lighter and happier too!
You might not think this affects your patience, but trust me, it will make an impact. Make sure to eat multiple meals a day, or else you will be angry and cranky. This is one of the fastest ways to lose your patience.
Make sure to also drink plenty of water. You will feel like you have more energy and be happier as well.
Even if this is a small step, every little bit will help you be more patient with your kids.
Moving around helps us release the tension and stress building up in us throughout the day. When you exercise, your body releases endorphins, which make you happier. And, when you are happier, you have more patience.
If you can, exercise outside, it will feel so much better! Be sure to also have your kids move around and exercise too. The more movement they have, the happier they will be as well.
Focus on How You Act
Most of the time, our kids act like us. So, if they aren’t cleaning up after themselves, instead of getting upset at them, see if you do the same thing. Kids will mimic us as we are their biggest role models, so if something about THEM is upsetting you, you will need to change how YOU act.
Another big way to not lose your patience is to simply not argue with your child. Once they see you are upset, they will begin to feel upset as well. This just leads to an anger cycle that is not worth it.
Instead of arguing, be firm and fair. Once you say something, stick to it, but also empathize with them and help them know you are on their side.
Remember, you are their role model, so if you are patient and calm, they will be too!
If you forget to have dinner ready at 5:00 pm, your kids will start to whine and get cranky. This will eventually make you snap as you rush to prepare something to eat.
Instead, be prepared throughout the day for what is to come. When you are prepared, fewer things can upset your or your children.
When you are prepared for the entire day, you won’t feel rushed or overwhelmed by your to-do list. This will in turn leave room for unexpected things to happen without you losing your temper.
Teach your kids to be kind to everyone, and start being more kind to your children. Be sure to give plenty of compliments throughout the day to them. You will start to notice everyone in the house is happier and kinder to each other!
Take a Break
If you feel like your patience is running low, take a break, and put yourself in a “time out.” You can even share with your kids what you are doing. This will teach them how to regulate their emotions as well.
Once you lose your patience, it will take time to fully calm back down. You can have everyone go and take some time in their rooms by themselves. You can meditate or just try to breathe and calm down.
Then, you can come back together and you will all feel happier.
Right after you take your patience break, apologize. We all feel terrible when we lose our patience with our kids, and we know we did wrong. Our kids need to know this too. It isn’t a sign of weakness to apologize to your kids, it is crucial.
This will help teach your kids about humility, responsibility and mentally strong kids. They will own up to their wrongdoings and will apologize when they are in the wrong too.
Give Yourself Grace
You will not be perfect. You will still lose your patience with your kids. It will happen. Simply give yourself grace, and try again.