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A New Study Shows That Kids Are The Most Misbehaved Around Their Moms

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Have you ever noticed that your kids are somehow nicer when you’re not around? Every Mom has probably noticed that. It’s almost a universal known thing that kids misbehave around their moms the most.

You’re not imagining it. Psychologists know that it happens and more importantly, they know why. It’s important that you know why, too. Speaking of what psychologists know about kids that can really help you as a parent, read our post about how and why you should recognize anxiety in children.

Why Kid Misbehave Around Their Moms the Most

We spotted this article, “Study: Children Are 800% Worse When Their Mothers are in the Room” (a fake study). Even though you will quickly realize that this is all in fun and totally fake, we all know that their is a lot of truth to this!

Why Kids Misbehave Around Their Moms

Unless there is some sort of trouble at home, kiddos know with every fiber in their little bodies that home is a safe place.

Sure, they know that if they grab a pair of scissors and jump up and down on the sofa, they are definitely getting in trouble.

And yes, they understand that hitting a sibling is going to put them on Mom’s bad side.

But more than anything else, kids understand that home is their soft place to land. They know they can trust you.

They know you love them no matter what.

Why Kid Misbehave Around Their Moms the Most

In a nutshell, that’s why kids misbehave around their moms.

When young children are at school, for example, they are using every part of their limited power over their impulses.

In other words, it takes a lot of self-control for them to be on the right side of the rules for so many hours.

Kids know what the world expects of them for the school day. They need to follow the rules. That’s their job. Follow those rules.

When they get home they are like a bottle of soda that’s been shaken until it’s going to pop. If you take that lid off too quickly, it’ll explode.

It’s not their fault. It’s a challenge for little brains to control their behavior for so long a time.

Then you show up. The person they trust. The person that will love them even when they’re not perfect.

They can finally breathe and relax. They can be who they are in that moment. Grumpy. Happy. Loud. Tired. Messy.

You’ll still love them – even if you get angry at them. They are certain of it.

Tip: You can help kids transition from being at school to being at home by giving them some time to be loud and to run around and exercise. It’s a release. It’s like taking off the lid of the soda bottle slowly.

Whether your child is perfect at school, or at daycare, or at a friend’s house and then they walk through your door as a loud, crazy kid monster, it’s all the same thing.

You can see that as an aggravation (which I know it is). Or you can take a deep breath and remember that because you’re a great Mom, your kids can be themselves with you.

So if your kids are nicer when you’re not around, remind yourself that it’s because you’re doing the whole Mom thing right.

You’ve taught your kids how to behave well in the world.

Even more importantly, you’ve taught them that you’re a loving Mom who will tuck them in bed and love them today, tomorrow and forever.

Nice going, Momma!

You may like this positive discipline book for toddlers for the days that they do act up around you. It’s very helpful!

Kids Misbehave The Most Around Their Moms

Why Kid Misbehave Around Their Moms the Most
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ABOUT JILL

I am a mom of 3 awesome boys that love to get crafty with me in the kitchen. Our blog is full of all sorts creative food ideas for the Holidays, Party Ideas, Free Printables, Featured DIY Ideas, Recipes, & Kids Craft Ideas! Read more...

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Oh wow, I knew it! 
Nah nah ma nah

Awesome information

Turns out fire is hot and the earth is round as well

I guess if you really read into it, it’s saying kids are different away from home. It’s a known fact. I am a father who raised my two boys and daughter by myself since they were about 5 years old. Now they are grown with kids of their own, and yet they still know they are safe and loved here with old dad. I am currently raising my 15 year old grandson for last 14 years. We have our ups and downs, but at the end of the day he knows he’s safe and loved with Papa. Great Article.

I agree with this article 100%, accepting gender roles even though I’m a Democrat. Women have the compassion for caring and nurturing, while men have the capacity to … wait game of thrones. SHUT UP!!! EVERYBODY

I wish we had the ability to “like” comments here, because Bill, you speak truth.

Wow! Great article and ineteresting point of view. I would have never thought about that. It brings soo much into perspective.

Absolute rubbish!!! Insert parent instead of mum you may have something. Stop associating home/with mum as the same thing you may have something. Absolute utter twoddle otherwise. There’s only one role at home and that is parent/guardian, there’s no gender attached to family roles, as there is only one !

Mindless. Children misbehave around the mother because the father is typically the one who does the disciplining (spanking). Not because “you’re a great Mom, your kids can be themselves with you.” or “because you’re doing the whole Mom thing right.” They can’t be themselves around dad, or?

“You’ve taught your kids how to behave well in the world.”

And now I present to you the crime statistics of father-less youths…

Absolute cringe to read. Pat yourself on the back some more.

Pffft ok I do the spanking the father isn’t in the picture!!! Actually nobody is I do it all by myself!!! My son acts terrible around me but anyone else will tell you he’s such a good kid!!! My response every time is haha live with him!!! Explain that!!! So yes I can relate to this article!!! And it’s definitely not because I don’t correct him!!! Believe me he gets his fair share of spankings!!!

Agreed. I was raised in the Caribbean by my mother and was expected to be well behaved at all times. My father was the more lax parent that allowed me to do what I wanted, but I was still well behaved because that’s how my mother raised me. I understand the whole “safe space” thing, but it doesn’t mean you can’t trust your parents and be well behaved at the same time. 

I supposed it boils down to The child’s personality and the parenting styles… 

Thank u. I just thought my parenting was way wrong and my dad and mother was better at it. My son tells me he doesn’t act out with my dad because he will get mad at him….. The aticle explains this way of thinking very well. He is afrade they wont love him as much and wants to follow the rules. But with me he knows i will still love him……

Many times we asked ourselves “where did we go wrong?” but recently we witnessed our 15 year old completely transform into a gentleman during a school interview. Then again during his school conference! We can finally see some real progress. Hoping for the best! Thank you for the article. 

I like how an article is written a certain way and females are quick to bash the males for asking the obvious question that the article has quietly presented. For the majority of homes there is a father present. So basically what it sounds like you are saying is that kids don’t trust that their dads will love them no matter what so. So they won’t misbehave around them because they don’t get that feeling of unconditional love? Very valid question I think

The answer to that question is a no brainer. Kids misbehave when they know someone is around who will take up for them when they do. An ally in other words.

This is exactly what’s wrong with kids today!  Parents who feel like children are entitled to their “space”.  As if school is a tremendous imposition on their rights or freedom to be children and we, as parents, have to provide opportunities for them to be “themselves”.  Absolutely ludicrous!  The job of parenting is to teach children to conform to the expectations of the world which will make no allowances for them. Stop acting as if childhood is some protected environment and it’s our job to cushion the blow. It’s our job to prepare them for the realities of life and we have created a generation of soft, weak children who will be destroyed when they face life head on. Don’t let your children be monsters with you, moms. Teach them to respect you, to obey you, to behave!  Life isn’t fair, get over it kids. 

Read a lot of comments that dad’s were left out – I get it. So that aside, I am the primary caregiver in our home. Our son does come to me more and behaves less well for mom, but goes to her for different things and we find balance. Let’s all agree to be reading this in the first place because we are caring, involved parents. parenting is hard enough without arguing who is who. We do the best we can, and sometimes (often) many of us feel even our best is not enough. Support each other. Rather than focusing the discussion on why was dad left out (I get it though), focus on providing that safe space for our kids to be who they are. That anger, disappointment and frustration are emotions we all have. They are not bad emotions, they are just less accepted and more difficult to navigate and learn how to handle. That’s where we (parents) come in. Validate the emotion, talk it through, help them recognize it and what to do with it.
well – that was longer than I thought- A solute to all of us – parents/caregivers (and all those really special folks raising grand children, nieces and nephews, and every way to raise children there is) – doing the best we can.

I love this read very much, And I agree, but I really think it’s not when Mom is around but when the child’s main caregiver is around.
Granted, the majority primary caregiver is mom, but in our changing world, with so many moms being career oriented that dads now are becoming the main caregivers in many homes.
Loved your article 

What about the “dad’s”????  Please answer me that!!
Why do kids listen to them?????

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