The Remarkable Magic of a Dad

Trying to describe all the ways a good Dad makes life better for his kids is almost impossible. There is no tie, or t-shirt, or mug that could even come close.

That won’t stop us from trying! So today, please let us tell you a few of the reasons, Dad, that you are our hero, our teacher, and our protector. And readers, we hope you’ll add your own most favorite Dad job titles in the comments.

To Dad, From the Kids of All Ages Who Adore Them

You take on so many jobs that make our lives better every single day. YOU ARE THE…

Designated Light Switch Monitor

We know we can always count on you to turn off every light in the house because you’re not made of money. We know you’re not made of money because you tell us all the time.

Are there people who are made of money, Dad? We’d like to see what they look like.

Change Machine

Dad, thank you for always having change. We don’t know where it comes from or why you never seem to run out, but you always have quarters and dimes when we need them.

Bug Executioner

Bugs are scary. You’re so, so brave because you aren’t afraid of them. Thank you for taking care of all the creepy, crawly things that freak us out.

Also, thanks for pushing us to get over our fear of bugs. We probably never will, but if it’ll make you happy, we’ll sure try.

Family Announcer

When we hear that booming, deep voice, we stop the world and listen up. How do you do that, Dad? Without ever yelling, somehow we could still hear you across any store, house, or city.

Professional Wrestler

We aren’t sure how many kids you can defeat at one time, but we’ve seen you stand up and walk around with at least 4 attached to you. Every time we put our brother in a sleeper hold we say a grateful… thank you.

Shoulder Sofa

There is no better vantage point for life than on the shoulders of a Dad. Everything looks nicer and kinder and less scary from way up there.

Monster Destroyer

There are monsters under every bed and in every closet of every child, everywhere. They are horned and green, tall and toothy, sneaky and invisible.

They are no match for you, Dad. You always send them back to wherever childhood monsters come from. No matter how old we are, from 8 to 48, you never stop slaying the monsters for us and with us.

Auto Mechanic

Whatever goes wrong with the car, you know what to do and who to call. Whether the Johnson Bar is dragging or the headlights need more halogen fluid, you’re the man to call.

Grilling Master Chef

Nobody makes a better burger than you, Dad. The special grilling tools you use, the flames that are occasionally so high we can’t believe you still have nose hair. We love it when the air is filled with the smell of you grilling something delicious.

Stand Up Comedian

When it comes to being funny, you are at the top of our list of the world’s funniest people. No matter how many times we’ve heard it before, we’ll always laugh when a bug hits the car windshield and you say, “Bet he doesn’t have guts enough to try that again!”

Gas Denier

Ummm Dad, have you ever passed wind and not blamed it on your kid, dog, or nearby tree frog?

Tenderhearted Ninja

You think no one sees you because you try to be stealthy. But Dad we know when you see us singing in a school play, or throwing a baseball harder than we ever have, you cry sometimes.

Arms of God

When we’re hurting, sad, and afraid, you hug us and we get to experience God’s love and yours all at once. There is no other explanation for why your hugs are so special and why we always feel better after a Dad hug.

Dads Everywhere, We Love You!

Share your favorite Dad job title with us in the comments. Let’s just see how long the list of things we love about dads can grow!