Good friends are like stars. You can’t always see them, but you always know they’re there. Do you have good friends like that?
If you have at least one really good friend, you should count yourself among the luckiest of people. Not everyone does. Whether your friend lives across town or across the country, distance doesn’t matter. Good friends have proven they understand and accept you for who you are, and that includes understanding when life keeps the two of you apart. You can count on them and they can count on you, even if you’re not together as often as you once were.
Do you have good friends like that?
To say that people are busy is the understatement of the century! There are demanding jobs, families, relationships, bills, stress, and the minutia of everyday life. It’s not easy to get away for coffee when your world is spinning around you.
Even as busy as everyone is, hopefully, you have at least one friend who doesn’t need constant contact to be there for you when you need someone. You know the kind I mean.
The friend who calls the moment she even gets a hint that something isn’t okay with you. It’s like she almost senses it. She’s the one who tells you it’s all going to be okay when everything is pointing to all the ways it’s not going to be okay.
Most of all, even if you and she haven’t seen each other in a month of Sundays, the moment you talk it’s like you were never apart. The same jokes are still funny. The same secrets you told each other years ago are still locked away. It’s as though time hasn’t passed at all.
The time and energy you have to give to any relationship can easily be used up by all the other things happening in your life. The squeakiest wheel gets oiled, right? Generally speaking, your friends probably aren’t particularly squeaky. Meanwhile, everyone and everything else in your life might be squeaking so loudly it’s all you can do not to cover your ears and hide under the bed.
Truly good friends understand. They know their friendship with you is safe and secure, even when you don’t have time to hang out. No matter where they are in the world, whether they live in another state or another country, you can count on their friendship.
Are you a dependable friend?
Sometimes we worry that if we don’t talk to our friends every day, or see them every week or two, that we’re not actually best friends anymore. That doesn’t have to be true.
It’s OK if you’re not in everyday contact with good friends anymore. As long as you both still know that you’ll show up when the chips are down, you can rest easy.
Are you a good friend?
What kinds of things do you do that let your friends know you’re there for them? Here are a couple of quick ways to keep up your end of the friendship. After all, you have to be a good friend to have a good friend.
1. Tell them. Pick up the phone and check-in. Even if it’s only a quick 5 minutes on your drive to work, tell them you miss them. We all want to be thought of.
2. Send them something small and special. Mail doesn’t always need to be about bills and junk mail. Have you ever received something cool in the mail you weren’t expecting it? It’s so much fun to open up a package and find a little treasure just for you.
You don’t have to spend a lot of money. Maybe use that Amazon Prime you pay for to send a bottle of pretty nail polish or a journal or even some fuzzy socks. If there is a running joke that only the two of you understand, try to find something that will remind them of it without ever saying a word.
3. Make time. It may not be easy to make an appointment, so to speak, with your good friends. But, you should keep trying. Even though we all have lives that make time with friends more difficult to carve out, that doesn’t mean we can’t do it.
We make time for the things we value. So, if you value your good friends, make time! Call them today and remind them they are loved. You’ll make their whole day.