Kids go nuts for pinatas at a birthday party. But, what about grown-ups? We don’t care about that weird pinata candy. We want what we love in a pinata. Little bottles of alcohol. Say hello to Nipyata – the adults-only booze pinata.
Speaking of adults-only goodies, there are plenty of recipes here you should try. How about a Tipsy Mermaid, or a banana pudding shot, or maybe a delicious salted caramel bourbon milkshake? They are straight-up amazing. You’ve been warned.
NIPYATA: Pinatas For Grownups
What mom or dad doesn’t love taking their kids to a birthday party where a big, colorful pinata takes center stage? It’s like kid bait. They flock to it the moment they see it. The best part, for all the parents standing around, is the thrill of the potential for a minor concussion when little Susie inevitably whacks little Marvin in the noggin with her pinata stick.
Don’t worry. Marvin will not be denied. He’ll grab as much of that candy as possible before you rush him off to the ER. He’ll have Tootsie Rolls for days.
Now, adults can whack pinata that’s just for them. The entire thing is filled with tiny bottles of booze. It’s called NIPYATA and when you read this, you’re going to want to order one or twelve so get your credit card ready.
What, exactly, is inside a NIPYATA?
Little 50ml plastic bottles of boozy goodness, that’s what! Think airplane bottles or shooters. Why does everything look so cute when it’s tiny? From liquor bottles to tiny hamburgers made of clay, if it’s a miniaturization of a full-size thing, I want it.
Once I got a mini bottle of hot sauce that I saved for months because you never know when a tiny hot sauce emergency will arise – plus it was super cute.
According to the NIPYATA site, their pinatas hold up to harder, adult swings. In other words, you have to hit it much harder than a child’s pinata, so gear up and really show those hidden bottles of joy who’s boss. In the event an adult man named Marvin happens to be nearby, don’t worry about hitting him in the head. Apparently, he’s used to it.
Ordering a NIPYATA that’ll make other pinatas jealous.
There are lots of customization available if you want it. Choose from a variety of liquors and pick a pinata in all sorts of fun shapes.
First, choose a pinata shape. One of the choices looks like a taco. Pick that one if you know what’s important in life. It’s called a TACO-YATA and now I want to use that word all day because it’s awesome.
Second, decide how many bottles to include. There was no option called “all of the bottles,” but there are 10 bottles for $89, 20 bottles for $119, and 30 for $139.
Ten bottles will have to do. Next, pick the brands you like. From Jose Cuervo Gold to Captain Morgan’s Spiced Rum, there’s a brand for every taste. If you’re ordering for someone else as a gift, they’re happy to send a handwritten note along.
Nearing the end of the ordering process, you’ll be presented with a choice of other things to include in the box. Condoms, for one. Ummmm. Okay, NIPYATA. I see what you’re doing there. I’m not sending this to a college fraternity!
There are also fake mustaches to include (now we’re getting somewhere) or CBD gummies. I don’t know about you, but I cannot think of a single birthday party that’s not made better by fake mustaches.
Ready to order some grown-up pinatas?
Go to NIPYATA and take a peek around. Don’t do what I did and leave the whole order in the cart. If you’re more of a grown-up than I am, and you order one, PLEASE come back here and share the pictures in the comments or post them on the Facebook page.